Sick...

Well, even though I said I would post another entry sooner, that obviously didn't happen. To explain why... let's just say I've been pretty sick, with no hint of getting better in sight. I've been having cramps, most parts of my body are in an achy kind of pain, and this cough I have is going to kill me I think. I had the cough since about mid way through Tahoe, but I didn't think much of it at that point in time. Turns out I was wrong since I'm pretty sure it was the start of this wave of crap I've been feeling since the trip. Most food makes me gag, and I've been living on basically only rice the past few days... It's getting really bland to say the least. I've thrown up quite a bit, which also sucks a lot. Anywho, I called Rebecca today and she came over to cook dinner and take care of me tonight. She told me that she noticed my cough after I went on a short little walk by myself through the neighborhood where we were staying. Said I was gone longer then she expected, and when I got back I had the terrible cough.... I don't remember that walk at all... let alone the day she told me it took place on... I just thought the trip felt shorter than I expected, but I had no idea I missed an entire day... well, before I dwell on that too much... I need my rest. Hopefully I can kick this thing before Rebecca forces me to go to the doctor. I hate doctors.

Until then,

-Ishamael

Great Vacation

Well, Rebecca and I got back from our Tahoe getaway today. Must say, it was the greatest time I've had in a long long time. I had some unexplainable mood swings though, no idea why. Definitely wasn't long enough at all. Well I'm tired so I don't feel like typing too much at this time. I'll probably throw a post up tomorrow. So,

Until next time,

-Ishamael

Bored?

I'm really starting to get bad at this whole title thing huh? I just can't seem to come up with a name for every single entry now. Maybe there is something wrong with me... Oh wait! There is. Anyways, I really have nothing to report on. It's amazing just how little there is to talk about when I'm not having any sessions with Dr. M. It's nice in a way. I've been spending huge amounts of time with Rebecca, and thankfully, it has not been focused on my... past. We're hanging out just to hang out. It's really really nice. My mind has been taken off of all the crazy shit that has happened to me recently, something I desperately needed.

Moving on. This weekend, and all next week, Rebecca and I will be spending our time in Tahoe. Something that we've been planning to do for months... well from the months I remember anyways. Since we're leaving this weekend, this entry should be the last one until we get back because I really shouldn't have much to say when I'm up there. So,

Until next time,

-Ishamael

-Here's where the catchy title goes-

Well, Father's day was... actually pretty good. It was nice hanging out with Rebecca and her family. It was just nice being part of an actual family for once... At least that is what they consider me. It' nice. It really is.

Anyways, haven't heard from Dr. M amazingly, don't know if he is waiting or just gave up, though the former seems way too likely. I don't know, he really got me angry with his nonchalant way of regarding Rebecca's worry, and my disappearance nonetheless. I'm not too sure if I'm going to continue working with him. Then again, I really have no idea about other psychologists in the immediate area, which could impede my progress in this... thing. And yet.... I am not even sure if you can call this... progress... nothing big has happened. I still can't remember anything about my family, besides tid-bits here and there that are just solely based on horrible experiences. I'm beginning to feel downtrodden by my own condition. I would just hate to have another period of time lost from my already forgotten life. This mystery of my own life is... getting old... really really old...



-Ishamael

Depressed

Well, Rebecca showed up yesterday. Said she just needed to get away for a few days, needed time to work everything through her head. She apologized for freaking out so bad though. I really don't blame her... at all.

Onto that last post. I.... really have no idea what to think. It's... obviously when my sister got taken. The weird part though is that I didn't go back to Dr. M to finish the session and get his treatment. Guess having to look for Rebecca made something click in my head. I don't know.

But... today is Father's Day. Really wish I had a Dad I can remember, so I could have someone to celebrate. I.... I'm just depressed really. Rebecca invited me to come with her today though. To get me out of the house and out of this mood I'm in. Well,

Until next time,

-Ishamael

Desperation

This Desperation fills my mind, my heart. My sister, gone. Running through these woods, trying Desperately to find her. She was just here minutes ago. Where could she have gone? Did someone Take her? Who would do such a thing? I need to find her. This man, off in the distance, standing, motionless, watching as I fall apart. I scream. Scream in Desperation. My feet start pounding the mud as I run after him. He’s gone, vanished. Alone in this rain soaked forest. In this now terrible world. My sister. Gone.

Explosion

Well Rebecca just stormed out of the session. She got into a screaming match with DR. M after I asked why he wasn't concerned over my whereabouts when I went missing, just exploded. It got pretty heated, and then she just walked out. I tried going after her but Dr. M pulled me back in, saying she'd be back. That she just needed time to cool off. I told him off and went after her anyways. But I'm having trouble finding her, so I may end up going back and seeing if she made her way back as well. We'll see,

-Ishamael